One day from retirement. One frozen pension. Eleven branch offices in the way.
A top-down pirate action game — spiritual successor to Overboard! (PS1, 1997). Built in Godot 4.6.
Captain Wilf Marlow is one day from retirement — and he knows exactly how cursed it is to say that out loud. The Cosmic Bank has frozen his pension on the eve of the payout, scattered the assets across eleven dimensional branch offices to dodge an audit, and politely suggested he "raise a ticket".
So he's going to sail to every single branch office, fight his way past each regional manager, and collect the eleven signed tokens he needs to get what he is owed: enough money to open the Salmon R Us franchise across the rainy street from his flat. Not a farm. A franchise. He has the brochure memorised.
Tone: earnest absurdism — somewhere between Banjo-Tooie and The Good Place. Cosmic horror treated as a customer-service problem.
Gruff, genre-savvy, bureaucratically exhausted. Sixty-something, British, not heroic — his motivation is entirely self-interested and he's at peace with that. Will argue with an Elder Thing about his pizza order before fighting it.
Sincere about exactly one thing: salmon. Carries a leather notebook of names for the fish he doesn't own yet. Knows optimal stocking densities by heart. Do not get him started.
A snarky seagull and former Cosmic Bank HR whistleblower. Quotes policy clauses at bosses mid-fight. Calls out "the salmon look" whenever Wilf drifts off mid-conversation.
Functions as navigator, conscience, and the only member of the crew who has actually read the pension scheme's terms and conditions.
Never raises his voice. Speaks exclusively in corporate euphemism — "we're going to need to loop back on that." Has been skimming pirate pensions for millennia; when the audit came due, he distributed the assets across eleven dimensions.
Appears in person only at Head Office. Until then his name is on every form, every employee-of-the-century plaque, every poster you sail past.
The hand-drawn salmon mascot of the Salmon R Us franchise pack. Appears on the brochure, the daydreams, and the flagship shopfront that is the game's true win condition: Wilf, in waders, naming the fish out loud.
Each dimension has its own water, its own hazards, its own unlockable weapon — and a regional manager with unreasonable KPIs who really doesn't want to countersign your pension token.
Broadside cannons, chain shot, and a forward cannon for first principles — then it escalates.
Plus eleven dimension-locked artifacts — one per branch office. Take them off the manager.
Captured from the real build. This is the diegetic main menu — the procedural Gerstner waves, GPU particles and full scene systems are running live behind the title, the same machinery the game itself sails on. No mock-up, no flat splash screen.
Built solo in Godot 4.6, GDScript and shaders, holding 120+ FPS.